No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
time to smoke my breakfast
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
