with your own penis?
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
