"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Randomize
