i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
