I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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