I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize