Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Randomize
