she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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