i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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