You really coming over, don't trick.
So drunk its hurt
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
