Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize