i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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