i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize