But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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