She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize