is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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