Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
