had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize