oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
