Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
