Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
