i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
