its not stalking. its research.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
