so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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