Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
