I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
