I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
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