Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Randomize
