omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize
