38 yer olds are good kisserssss
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
