yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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