Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
