hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
