Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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