Taylor Swift is so right about you.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
