i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize