I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize