Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
