does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
