No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize