i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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