sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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