Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Randomize
