who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
