my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
