I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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