I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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