I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Randomize
