I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
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