You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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