I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
he fucked my hip out of place.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
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