oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize