dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
and she was petting her beer can
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
