Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
You've changed since you got that strap on
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
